Valentine’s Day is hard if you’re single. Especially if it’s your first single V-Day in a while. Whether you just got divorced or went through a bad break up, the last thing you want to think about is all those happy little couples going on their happy little dates and you just wish you could wring their happy little necks. Unfortunately, that would technically be considered assault. So instead of committing a felony, celebrate something else this year. There are so many things that happened on Feb. 14 that are way cooler than some greeting card holiday. For example:
1. Do you live in Oregon or Arizona? It’s Statehood Day!
Residents of Oregon and Arizona never have to celebrate Valentine’s Day again. Feb. 14 is the anniversary of the day they became states, in 1859 and 1912 respectively. If you live in either state, you don’t even have to think about heart-shaped boxes of chocolates. When someone wishes you a happy Valentine’s Day, just smile and say right back to them, “Happy Statehood Day!” If you don’t live in one of those two states, maybe now’s the time to move. We hear Arizona is lovely this time of year. Or go to Portland and open that combination bookstore/coffee shop/puppy massage parlor you’ve always dreamed of.